Wednesday, 13 June 2012

Flipping cancer rollercoaster!!!!


Flipping.............flipping............................. FLIPPING.................. heck!!! Deep breath………….mmmmhhhmmmmm breathe in love ......breathe out peace! What a flippin’ day! I should be used to ‘bumps in the road’ and ‘blips’  etc, but today I fully require sedation!

I have been waiting for my Consultant to call re my results from Friday's PET scan, really hoping I didn’t have to wait til Thursday when I am due Cycle 7 of Brentuximab. I was trying not to think about the fact that my scan report would be just sat in the hospital computer system waiting to be read and thus determine my fate. So yes... I have tried to be patient but by this morning I was getting a bit worked up…everytime the phone rang I leapt on top of it already playing out the conversation in my head…….see I will let you in to a little secret here- I am NOT ill, like just not at all! This week I have been playing badminton for 2 hours straight, going to the gym, doing salsa, out and about on my bike and generally having more energy than most people I know……..I repeat I am NOT ill! So what in the name of arse is going on?? Well, surely the hodgkin's has gone?! Surely!? I am trying not to get my hopes up really I am but I can’t help it!

Anyway, so I called the unit this am and spoke to one of the fab nurses and asked if I could come get my pre chemo bloods done there today and also asked her to track down the Consultant whereabouts today with the hope of  getting results later when I come in. She was on to it and said she would try and see what was going on before I went in this afternoon….great.

So I rocked up for chemo bloods to be told I wouldn't actually abe having chemo tomorrow because my Consultant hadn't been able to be in today and therefore it wasn't prescribed (it is a complex process 'cos I am the first in the region to have it and the protocol had to be written especially pour moi...) also he hadn't read my scan report  so also could not make decision to continue treatment. So would I come back next week!! Now usually in the face of bad news (I have had a fair bit) I switch in to super pragmatic mode, but today  was uncharacteristically gutted and had to fight back the tears :(  I NEED the results asap!! AND if I don't get treatment this week the next one will fall on my Spain holiday! Nnnnoooo!!!

So, luckily my dear heart was awaiting my call from upstairs in the hospital and while I went off to swoon over labrador puppies with my dad, he went and tried to ensure  I got treated this week. Upshot is they will call us in the morning after chatting with Dr to see when is the soonest I can go in........phew!

Meanwhile - I have been in contact with a great website - Chemochic.org  I think I mentioned it way back last year. It's a very inspirational, polished and professional site, check it out. Anyway they may be using a piece I wrote re hairloss, yess!! I am very honoured, it's such a fab website and I am proud to be involved :) They just e mailed me today which put me on a real high so that was my UP! and hospital was my DOWN......trying to find the middle ground...

Well, large glass of Pinot Grigio and Tesco meal for two, hot bath and bed, sorted........tomorrow is another day!

Oh - and have been messing with my blog layout...whaddya think??

Peace
x


No comments:

Post a Comment